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biowolfbabee and I are no longer together in a relationship.
It was decided Friday afternoon. We've been pondering this for a while because of school and how we really need to focus on our school work instead of nourishing a relationship. I really didn't want to because... Well, because I wasn't ready. Even if he told me that it was for my own good. I believe him when he says it. I know him pretty well. So basically, I've been crying and depressed since then. I can't get my mind off of things... but in attempts to do so, I've put things he gave me into a box and tore up all the drawings that I drew of him and me together. They just hurt too much to look at. Even though this wasn't a typical breakup (where the love is practically one sided in the end), it's still torture on my soul. o_o Especially because I've been saying and doing really stupid things, most of which I wholeheartedly regret. For example, we were texting and I said something kind of stupid... something that was completely untrue. Once I saw that he read my messages and didn't respond, I suggested that we just stay away from each other for a couple of weeks to get over everything for just a little while. I now realize that this could turn out badly. With all that time to himself to think, he could end up hating me in the duration of 2 weeks. Maybe that's for the best. Besides... I can't blame him if he hates me. After all then things I said.
He said earlier today and yesterday that he still loves me and that he's only doing this because he loves me. I hope that he still feels that way later. And he said that there's a chance that we may get back together sometime in the future. Like sometime after we're COMPLETELY finished with school. That'll take years... by then, he may have a new girlfriend. But regardless... I'd still wish him well.
I really do hope that there is a chance that we can get back together again. Even if those chances are looking really slim. </3
It was decided Friday afternoon. We've been pondering this for a while because of school and how we really need to focus on our school work instead of nourishing a relationship. I really didn't want to because... Well, because I wasn't ready. Even if he told me that it was for my own good. I believe him when he says it. I know him pretty well. So basically, I've been crying and depressed since then. I can't get my mind off of things... but in attempts to do so, I've put things he gave me into a box and tore up all the drawings that I drew of him and me together. They just hurt too much to look at. Even though this wasn't a typical breakup (where the love is practically one sided in the end), it's still torture on my soul. o_o Especially because I've been saying and doing really stupid things, most of which I wholeheartedly regret. For example, we were texting and I said something kind of stupid... something that was completely untrue. Once I saw that he read my messages and didn't respond, I suggested that we just stay away from each other for a couple of weeks to get over everything for just a little while. I now realize that this could turn out badly. With all that time to himself to think, he could end up hating me in the duration of 2 weeks. Maybe that's for the best. Besides... I can't blame him if he hates me. After all then things I said.
He said earlier today and yesterday that he still loves me and that he's only doing this because he loves me. I hope that he still feels that way later. And he said that there's a chance that we may get back together sometime in the future. Like sometime after we're COMPLETELY finished with school. That'll take years... by then, he may have a new girlfriend. But regardless... I'd still wish him well.
I really do hope that there is a chance that we can get back together again. Even if those chances are looking really slim. </3
Rant About Life
WARNING: LOOOOOOOOONG RANT AHEAD. I HAVE NO EXPECTATION FOR PEOPLE TO READ ALL THE WAY UP TO THE END.
It's been a while since I've posted a journal. It's also been a while since I've logged into DeviantArt. Not since that last breakup, anyway.
So.. I suppose I'll just update my life a little bit.
I just finished my first year of college. Woo hoo! I'm attempting to get a Summer job. I have a car... but I have no money to go anywhere lol. All the money I have is for school and such. Um... I'm not sure what classes I should take next semester. I'll probably go to a counselor before the end of the Summer semester to get a better i
I don't deserve love...
I broke up with my boyfriend today...
Not because I don't love him anymore; I love him very much from the bottom of my heart.
Things just... didn't feel right in the relationship anymore. I knew it months ago but kept denying it. I didn't want to hurt him. I didn't want to hurt myself. Things didn't feel right, but I was comfortable, despite having all of my doubts. But just recently, I decided that it wasn't fair to him. It wasn't fair to have him remain clueless and thinking that everything was perfectly alright when it really wasn't.
Or maybe I'm just being selfish, I don't know... But I feel miserable. I know that I need time t
Devious Journal Entry
Rules:
1. You must post these rules(VERY Important ).
2. Answer the questions the tagger set for you in his/her post, and create 10 new questions for the people you tag to answer.
3. You have to choose 5 people to tag and post their icons on your journal.
4. Go to their pages and tell them you have tagged her/him.
5. No tag backs.
6. No crap in the tagging section about "you are tagged if you're reading this." You legitimately (AKA, really, truly with all honesty) have to tag 5 people.
MY QUESTIONS FOR YOU
1. DeviantART or Tumblr?
A: deviantArt
2. Pie or cake?
A: Pie
3. What's your favorite color??
A. Purple
4. Favorite pet...?
A: Pu
Tagged???
Tagged by ~edo67 (https://www.deviantart.com/edo67)
Ten truths about me.
1- I'm a HUGE Owl City fan.
2- I swear that I have social anxiety.
3- I'm really shy except when I'm around my close friends. Pervy friends. owo
4- I rely on instinct when trying to figure out who I can have a real conversation with and who will just look at me and back away slowly.
5- I'm currently single and I'm starting to get it through my head and I'm beginning to get used to it.
6- Fuck, I'm going to be a high school senior, and I'm NOT prepared.
7- I'm writing this... nakey. lol awkward
8- I like yaoi. Not as much as some of my friends, though.
9- I'm really freakin
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